undermoonlight: (26)
中島 敦 ( atsushi nakajiima ) ([personal profile] undermoonlight) wrote in [community profile] soddersays 2020-06-29 11:47 am (UTC)

[Atsushi listens and catches his breath. There is so much on this girl's mind and heart, and while he does not understand every confession he does understand the guilt. He isn't always the most in tune to the emotions of others, sometimes missing subtleties because he's had few chances to hone his empathy. But in this moment, he at least grasps sympathy.

When the doors click open, Atsushi doesn't immediately turn his head towards it. He's still facing the dividing wall, focused more on Inaba than his potential escape. If he does move to test his door, it'll only be because he heard Inaba move first. He won't leave and risk her being alone. Not when saying all of that must have left her feeling very vulnerable.

Before either of them can leave, Atsushi does speak up;]


I used to... dislike [hate, fear,] my ability too. And...

[And the last thing she said... It reminds him of when he talked to Mother Superior. The way she talked about driving the people here to kill each other. It sounds like someone pushed this girl into a horrible situation as well. Atsushi can't hate someone whose only sin is surviving an awful situation. But it still makes his blood boil to think she escaped one sad world and will now be tormented by Mother Superior in another. He imagines how that horrible woman might even delight in dredging up Inaba's guilt and weaponizing this way.]

We're alive. Sometimes, that's the best choice we can make.

[He almost ends it there.

But being in a confessional, compared to the image of that nun in a gas mask... He clenches his fist. He doesn't want Inaba's courageous confession used to hurt her later.]


It may not be my place, but if I'm allowed... I forgive you.

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