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Sodder ([personal profile] sodder) wrote in [community profile] soddersays2018-09-30 12:01 am
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October 2018 Test Drive Meme




OCTOBER 2018 TEST DRIVE MEME









Welcome to October’s Test Drive Meme! This month's Test Drive's theme is: HALLOWEEN HORROR.

All Test Drive Memes contain at least one clue to the Deerington's upcoming in-game events for the month! Keep your eyes peeled! But...not literally.

Characters may die during TDMs, but you do not need to count it towards a game-canonical death unless you want to. Consider it a freebie. All TDMs can be considered game canon as TDMs introduce minor aspects about the world of Deerington that can be revisited by characters later on in the game. You may also use TDMs for your application writing sample as well as AC.

CW: Wet and rotting corpses/zombies, ghosts, violence, blood, knives, possessed dolls, options for underage drinking

Don't forget to tag content whenever necessary. Have fun!











IT’S JUST A BUNCH OF HOCUS POCUS


It’s not Halloween if you don’t make a trip to a cheesy haunted house. At least, that’s what everyone in Deerington likes to say. The old Victorian stands at the top of a hill, rickety and in desperate need of a new paint job. The yard and porch have been decorated with what you’d expect for your typical haunted house; fake spider webs spread across the overhang, painted foam grave markers with cheesy names like “Here lies Richard Cranium” and “BEWARE!!” in creepy letter etchings. You can see the blinking of variously timed strobe lights in some windows and the shadow of what you’re pretty sure is a full-sized doll standing in the window, meant to look like someone staring out at you. The rocking chair on the porch near the door has a skeleton with a bowl of candy in his lap, and a sign is propped up against the wall next to him.

“ENTER AT YOUR OWN RISK. TOUCH NOTHING AND NOTHING WILL TOUCH YOU!”


Well that sounds promising.

The first few rooms you enter are appropriately cheesy. There’s the silly burst of air that you hear just before a plastic figuring pops out of a poorly constructed coffin, the clicking sound of the machinery inside echoing in the room when it starts to pull back and the lid closes once again. There’s fog machines trying to give the appropriately spooky air, stuffed sheets shaped to look like dead bodies wrapped up laying in piles on the floor with fake blood staining the white fabric, black lighting to show off words scribbled on doors like “TURN BACK NOW” and “SOMETHING WICKED THIS WAY COMES.” Nothing you haven’t seen before. It might be even worse than things you’ve seen before, over the top cheesy, boring enough to give a yawn. Each door seems to open on its own so you don’t even have to touch the handles.

As you make your way through the next automatic door, the room you walk into is different than those before it. It’s a regular children’s room. A bed against the wall near the window, a dresser in the corner, a small desk with a chair. Nothing out of the ordinary, save for the lights not being on, and the strange flickering light in the closet. You step towards it, figuring you’re in for another jump scare, but the door doesn’t open. Whether you’re naturally the curious sort or not, something in the back of your mind makes you want to open the door and see what’s on the inside.

If you fight it and walk towards the next automatic door, you’ll find you’ve walked out to the backyard of the house, those same foam decorations and a dozen or more jack o’ lanterns lighting your way on a path back to the town.

If you choose to pull the door open, however, it’ll take you into yet another room, with a flickering television playing nothing but static. Once you step past the doors of the closet, they slam shut behind you and whoever else dared to enter. The doors won’t lock no matter what you do, no matter how strong the person shaking the handles or pushing against the wood may be. You realize you broke the one rule; you’ve touched something. But can things now really touch you?

The only light source in the whole room is that television and it’s not lighting up much inside the room around it. If you squint when the TV is at its brightest setting, you can just make out another door. Your exit, you hope. But as you make your way towards the door, the flickering suddenly stops, the TV steadily bright, a low humming noise coming from the screen, and suddenly the door seems several more feet away from you than it was a second ago. Before you can reach the door, there’s the sound of trickling water from behind you. If you choose to look back, you’ll see something coming out from the screen - a girl with soaked clothing and pale, rotted skin. She emerges fully from the glass and starts to move towards you. You know it’s best to start running for that door. If you stay and try to fight, you’ll find that no regular weapons work on her, though special weapons and powers that are effective against spirits will definitely do the trick. For those who don’t have any of these at their disposal, however, there is one more hope besides just trying to run; two old school VHS tape sit on the table near by, a fancy machine between them that is meant to copy one to the other. Work as a team and have one distract her while the other records, and you’ll find that she disappears as quickly as she flickered on the screen and the TV will return to static.

Regardless of what you choose before carrying on, the next room you come to as the door slams and locks behind you is entirely different. Brightly lit and filled with what seems like hundreds of porcelain dolls, it’s almost hard to tell where there could possibly be another exit hidden among the massive shelves. You can start to wind your way through them, but before long, you start to hear the sound of running feet, the jingling of bells, the swish of satin, and most eerily the sounds of children giggling - but there’s nothing that sounds save about them. Some of the dolls you saw on the last shelf seem like they’ve moved and are sitting in the corner or laying in a new position on a new shelf. Sometimes you swear you can see their heads turn to watch you pass, but it has to be a trick of the light, doesn’t it?

That is until one of those dolls runs by you, brandishing something shiny in their hands - something sharp. A knife, you realize too late, as it tries to slice at your legs and knock you down. You can kick them away and they’ll go flying, and when the porcelain smashes, the doll will scream in agony. You notice there’s blood pouring from the hole that formed, spreading quickly across the ground. The dolls are easy to kill, but are they really just dolls? You can take your time to contemplate that later, as now you have to fight your way through the violent and armed toys to reach the door at the end of the maze of shelves. Hopefully you can get out without too many severe injuries.

When (or if) you do manage to get to the next room, you seem to have a chance to take a breath and tend to any wounds. It’s decorated like the room of a small cottage, a large pot over the fireplace that isn’t lit, and several jars full of (possibly rotting) food and herbs on the shelves. You see a book on the stand in the center, latched shut and covered in dust. You can open it, if you want, but remember the warning you ignored that got you in trouble in the first place. It’s probably better to carry on to the next room.

If you do choose to open the book, though, there will be eerily glowing text lining the pages, the light will seem to poor out and fill the room, and you’ll be transported back out in front of the house.

Those who continued through the door will find themselves out in the backyard. Just like for those who got out sooner, there are dozens of jack o lanterns, but the graves don’t look like they’re made of foam this time. They’re real stone, engraved with real names and real dates this time. And the ground underneath them seems to be moving, like someone’s trying to crawl out of there. Better not to wait around. Soon as you start to move down the path, you’ll start to hear the sounds of groans as the undead start to crawl from their own graves, pulling themselves up through the dirt, and determined to get to the only food source they see - you. The zombies seem like they’re never ending, coming from every inch of the yard, but at least they’re just like normal zombies - completely incapable of being killed unless you cut off the head. There are shovels lying next to a few graves if you need a quick weapon, but there’s also still always the option to run as fast as you can up the stone path to the front of the house and back towards the street.

When you do finally manage to get back to the front, there’s a momentary blinding flash of light, disorienting anyone near it for a few seconds. When it finally fades, any leftover zombies chasing you have disappeared and the house looks like the same, cheesy haunted house you walked up to in the first place. If for some reason you decide to go and explore the backyard again, the grass will be back to normal, and the graves will all be replaced by cheaply painted foam once more.

Was that all in your head? Who knows. But maybe it’s best to just get out of here.



WE DID THE MASH


Somehow the street lamps have all been converted to oil based flames, the Authority are in witch hats, and every where you go there is music that seems to be playing from faintly glowing bats hanging upside down from telephone wires. The bats will open their mouths in succession, seeming somehow capable of producing the sounds of instruments and singers alike of popular Halloween songs.

Yards are decorated as thoroughly as the front of stores. Maybe you haven't bothered to decorate, but your neighbor sure has! Fake gravestones are propped up in yards, giant fake spiders in trees, and no matter where you walk, the ground seems covered in thick, rolling fog from machines. Or at least you hope it's coming from machines. Hell, you can't even find it in yourself to be too worried! Everyone around you is having way too good of a time! And God, there is food everywhere! Might as well grab a bite while you're out, huh?

It's tempting to break loose and dance. Jack-O-Lanterns absolutely crowd the streets. There's more than you can even begin to count, and all of them are lit all throughout the night. Even if you accidentally trip over some, they don't seem to catch fire to anything or go out! Some neighbors have camp fires set up with marshmallows to roast, while others have...are those broomsticks? Well that's kinda cool, you guess. Correction: it's really cool since you can actually pick one up and take it for a fly! Make sure to attach a little lamp to the front though because God knows it's dangerous flying at night. The brooms only work if you wear the appropriately provided hats, of course, but you can keep both the broom and hat indefinitely and have a readily available means of flight in Deerington after! Be forewarned though: the brooms are as easily broken as regular brooms and the hats easily blown away in the wind.


TRICK OR TREATS

At any of the events, especially the nighttime partying, you can find any number of the following treats (and their potential side effects):
Donuts (Will make you deliriously happy. Everything is amazing to you. May cause a lot of affection. A lot of affection.)
Candy Apples (You will eagerly tell someone everything you like about them. Talk about a sweet tooth.)
Candy Corn (Will make you extremely sad. Like god, you'll be wondering why you hate yourself so much.)
Pumpkin Spice Lattes (Causes suspicious amounts of obedience and a desire to do what you're told.)
Hot Chocolate (Can provide some minor healing. Best stuff to drink with a common cold!)
Hot or Cold Apple Cider (Nothing will happen. It's just really good.)
Alcoholic Cider (This isn't your grandma's apple cider. This stuff will knock you on your ass. Anyone who drinks this will get wasted regardless of whether or not they are immune to alcohol or even ingest regular food. It only takes one or two before you start to get tipsy, but any more than that and you'll be well on your way to drunk. Please drink responsibly. We don't need any FUIs.)


Character Arrival

You can read how all characters arrive in Deerington here.

There is not a collective "all these characters showed up at the exact same moment" occurrence in Deerington. Since characters fall asleep, die, or pass out at various times throughout all their worlds, it wouldn't make too much sense if they arrived in game all at the exact same time. There should be some discrepancy between character arrival, whether by a couple minutes, hours, or even days up to a week.

The players are entirely in control of how/when they want to play their characters arriving in Deerington. For TDMs, you can play it like your character has just arrived and that can be maintained as your game canon, or you can wait until game events for that moment. Or you don't need to acknowledge it at all. The flexibility for character allows a bit more of an organic feel to the character arrival situation, so please play it to whatever feels right for you.

If you are interested in having an "arrival" introduction for one of your TDM prompts, you are more than welcome to explore that option.
4thwaller: (🗡 And if they don't dance)

[personal profile] 4thwaller 2018-10-30 06:56 am (UTC)(link)
[ Wade would probably have a lot more to say if he weren't y'know shocked silent by a. more muscles and b. that nasty looking injury. It takes a LOT to get Wade to shut the fuck up. So... Congrats. ]

What happened to your shoulder? [ Sorry, were you saying things Peter? Give Wade a moment to reboot. ]

-- wait, did you seriously just pick up trash because you're afraid of another ghost? We totally kicked Samara's ass.

[ There we go, that's back to normal, Wade chatting away. His head tips to the side as he watches Peter redress himself, he'd probably realise that was creepy if it weren't for the fact that he was lost in his own thoughts about how to deal with the knives in him. If he pulls them out, they'll bounce to Peter. He doesn't exactly want to cut their meeting short though. Though he figures Peter does. Maybe he could con him into some apology diner fries. Would a diner let him in with knives in him? ]
quipsandthwips: (pic#12644949)

[personal profile] quipsandthwips 2018-10-30 07:06 am (UTC)(link)
I got stabbed a while back.

[Peter says, his face squished against shirt fabric as he struggles it back over his head. Phew — worst part over. He starts re-buttoning his dumb flannel and seems to be — uh, blowing right past that lame-ass explanation with bravado.]

More like a video machine did the ass-kicking, while we drowned. And judging from the dolls that went full-Chucky on us, I think it's better to be safe than sorry. So stop touching stuff in here, huh?

[Oh great, he's back to Mr. Teacher lecturing mode.

... He frowns a little when he realizes he missed a button hole on his shirt, and starts unbuttoning it to re-button it again. The endless struggle, he swears to god.]
4thwaller: (🗡 If your answer's kind)

[personal profile] 4thwaller 2018-10-30 07:18 am (UTC)(link)
With what? [ Wade's never quite seen an injury like that before. And he's seen a LOT of injuries. ] Why did someone stab you? [ Well, he can't really tell it's a sensitive topic because Peter had a face full of shirt when he answered.

Wade lifts a hand, flapping a wrist at him.
] No, that was totally our win. We kicked her ass and you can't take that from us. Sure. I stopped breathing for a second and you were almost drowned.

[ He turns to look around the room. He kinda did some touching when he was looking for stuff to use. ] Scout's honour. [ Look he's even raising his hand like he means it. ] Seltzer and lemon juice to get the blood out of your shirt.
quipsandthwips: (pic#12665503)

[personal profile] quipsandthwips 2018-10-30 07:27 am (UTC)(link)
The end of a crowbar, during a mugging. The joys of living in New York City after hours.

[Hey, look at that — he had that all pre-planned and everything, because he didn't want to face what happened back home anyway... Not that he planned for the injury to come up at all, because — well, to be honest, he'd forgotten about it with the knives and ghosts and all that jazz. He eyes Wade skeptically for a moment.

Is he really gonna act like...?

Ugh. He clears his throat. Loudly.]


So, can I throw out your knife collection now, or what?
4thwaller: (🗡 So I'm never gonna dance again)

[personal profile] 4thwaller 2018-10-30 07:44 am (UTC)(link)
[ The whites of Wade's mask narrow, like he doesn't quite believe what he's hearing. Sure, he's stabbed someone with a crowbar before. But he's never seen anyone else do it. Usually the instinct is to swing it.

He also doubts that a crowbar stabbing would bruise like that. Wade can't quite decide if he's a battered boyfriend/husband, one of Wade's own victims, or someone who tussled with the wrong mutant. But sure, he'll accept it for now.

It doesn't help that Peter's moving the subject along like he doesn't want to talk about it.
]

No. It's mine. [ Wade eyes him, like he's not sure if he should be putting space between them or not. ] You can't have them. [ Actually... He might keep them, they'd be good for stabbing people while he doesn't have his swords or knives, besides, how hilarious would it be to stab bad guys with doll knives? ]
quipsandthwips: (pic#12619065)

[personal profile] quipsandthwips 2018-10-30 07:54 am (UTC)(link)
[Good, yes, drop the subject.

... Into an annoying subject.

He squints so hard at him. SO HARD.]


... I let you handle mine. Now this is the part where we handle yours.

You're not gonna seriously wander around covered in doll knives.
4thwaller: (🗡 Safety-dance)

[personal profile] 4thwaller 2018-10-30 08:06 am (UTC)(link)
[ Don't mind him IGNORING THAT SQUINT to meander over and pick his brick back up. ]

No, this is the part where you be a good rescuee and thank me for patching you up and telling me how great I am and how I'm now your favourite superhero.

[ He's humble. ]

Because I am gonna seriously wander around covered in doll knives.
quipsandthwips: (pic#12635261)

[personal profile] quipsandthwips 2018-10-30 08:14 am (UTC)(link)
Why?

[HANDS THROWN UP, THIS IS SO RIDICULOUS THAT I'M ARGUING WITH YOU.]

You're being totally unreasonable here!

If you heal, it'll only take a minute to make you good as new! Are you worried I'm gonna turn on you and use you like a pincushion? Because I gotta say, I've been working my butt off to make sure you don't super die, so that makes absolutely zero sense. Is there something here you're not being honest with me about?
4thwaller: (🗡 Cuz I'm not planning on going solo)

[personal profile] 4thwaller 2018-10-30 08:20 am (UTC)(link)
[ Wade's head jerks back and he fixes Peter with a look. One that's kind of impossible to tell but there's some kind of look going on. Apparently he hadn't expected this reaction. ]

I wasn't worried about that, but now I am. [ ... Wait. WAIT. ] What do you mean you've been working your butt off to make sure I don't super die? [ He crosses his arms over his chest, looking like an overgrown petulant child. ] My healing factor is weird here. What do you mean you've been working your butt off to make sure I don't super die?

[ Ruh roh, Peter. Explain yourself!!!! ] I've been making sure you don't die!
quipsandthwips: (pic#12665493)

[personal profile] quipsandthwips 2018-10-30 08:28 am (UTC)(link)
[He throws his hands up, like 'CAN YOU BELIEVE THIS GUY?!' in motion.]

I didn't know you even healed in the first place! I was just trying to help someone out who I thought was in a crappy situation like me — one he started, sure, but I wasn't about to let you croak on my watch!

How am I supposed to know what's weird or not here?

[He points at him.]

... And for the record, you made this a life and death thing. Not me.

I was actually listening to the ominous signs. You act like you've never seen a single horror movie in your entire life!
4thwaller: (🗡 My best friend told me)

[personal profile] 4thwaller 2018-10-30 08:37 am (UTC)(link)
[ He can't see it but wade is WRINKLING HIS NOSE at him. He doesn't appreciate being shouted at!!!! ]

Me croaking wouldn't be on your watch! [ How dare you sound more like a superhero than him???? He's the one in the suit here!!!!! ] And I did croak on your watch! I stopped breathing! And NONE OF THIS was on your watch anyway because it was MY watch!

[ !!!!!!!! ]

Fine, be mad at me for that, you're allowed. [ Why is he suddenly so mad!!!! Oh, wow, okay, well, the 6'2" dude is definitely storming up to Peter like he's ready to throw down. Not that he has any intention of actually throwing down. ] I've seen plenty of horror movies! I thought it would be FUN.
quipsandthwips: (pic#12665492)

[personal profile] quipsandthwips 2018-10-30 08:52 am (UTC)(link)
You croaked on my watch because you tried to shove a supernatural ghost child back into a television!

[You cannot measure the stress in the higher octave he hits there. But hey, he has great experience with not backing away from people taller than him. Kingpin is a good one; you should try standing up close and personal with that cupcake. He instead folds his arms and huffs, not moving away from the grumpy masked hero(?).] And I got stabbed in the back, so I'll have to say — no, this isn't that fun—!

[Also you're really close and all up in his grill, so—

He's gonna reach out and try to pull a cute teeny pitchfork out of your forearm.]
Edited 2018-10-30 08:52 (UTC)
4thwaller: (🗡 Let beauty come out of ashes)

[personal profile] 4thwaller 2018-10-30 09:03 am (UTC)(link)
[ Wade gasps dramatically, reaching out and snatching the teeny pitchfork back, so he can shove it right back where it had been before, wincing as he does but otherwise acting like it doesn't hurt all that much. ] How dare you! What did I say about my knife collection!

[ He's beyond offended, offended was thirty five miles back. ] It wasn't your watch! It was mine. And It worked!!! [ Peter's not the only one raising in octaves. If there are any ghosts in here, they definitely know these two are here.

He's more menacing when he has his weapons. God, he really misses Bea and Arthur and Shooty and Bang Bang and Stabby and Hugh.
] It was fun before you got stabbed in the back!

Stop trying to take my knife collection, it'll only end badly for you! [ Is that a threat? Sorta... But not exactly. ] AND IT WASN'T YOUR WATCH. Stop superhero cockblocking me!
quipsandthwips: (pic#12619092)

1/2

[personal profile] quipsandthwips 2018-10-30 09:05 am (UTC)(link)
...............................
quipsandthwips: (pic#12644947)

[personal profile] quipsandthwips 2018-10-30 09:14 am (UTC)(link)
You're nuts!

[He side-steps him and starts walking, at the end of a magical rope.

It's getting more and more obvious this is not an ordinary civilian for Spider-Man to over-see, especially with how absolutely impossible the dude is. And superhero? More like supertired, thanks — Deadpool can obviously handle things.]


You want me to stop cramping your style, I'm more than happy to go do my own thing; you can be a superhero over here, and I'll just go on ahead this way. [Wow, Wade, he's not scared of you or your brick. Figures. He's really actually giving you a cold shoulder now. Oh, how life imitates art.

Also oh no, you annoyed a civilian into ditching you for any potential danger ahead.

Your superheroing is failing terribly, Wade Wilson.]
4thwaller: (🗡 I don't know what)

[personal profile] 4thwaller 2018-10-30 09:27 am (UTC)(link)
Wow! That's the first time I've heard that one! [ Oh no, his feelings have been hurt. Maybe he should take these little knives out. Peter's making him angry enough that he's seriously considering it. But instead he balls up a fist. No, no he's not going to cause this guy any more harm. Especially not after seeing that nasty mark on his shoulder. ] I'm protecting you. [ The words are ground out in agitation as he follows Peter. ]

This place made my healing factor weird. Whenever I heal from something it bounces the injuries back on whoever I'm around. [ At least, he's pretty sure that's what's happening.

He's definitely not going to let Peter wander into potential danger without him.
] I heal. It hurts you. [ Does it suddenly make sense why he's not wanting to take those out? They do hurt, and he is grumpy because he's being shouted at while he has a bunch of weapons embedded in him. ]
quipsandthwips: (pic#12665500)

[personal profile] quipsandthwips 2018-10-30 09:32 am (UTC)(link)
[Peter stops at the door, stills for a moment — processing the explanation, maybe.

Turns slowly.

Surprisingly, he just looks worried now; so much for having something to aim that ire at. Granted, a small sliver of him is annoyed — but mostly just worried, as is his usual method of handling just about anything regarding someone else's health and wellbeing.]


... Why didn't you just say that?

[He wouldn't have pushed for it so hard, and that much is implied in the placated tone.

Geez, Wade.]
4thwaller: (🗡 Never been the same)

[personal profile] 4thwaller 2018-10-30 09:39 am (UTC)(link)
[ Almost every emotion seems to disappear from Wade and he shrinks back from that look a bit. ] Because I knew you'd give me the Bambi eyes and I didn't want you to worry about it. Or feel bad. Or whatever this is.

[ Look at him, crossing his arms again. ]

Stop it with that look, I feel like I need to donate money to the ASPCA or adopt a child in Africa.

[ He's seriously going to need Peter to stop. Be mad again or something. ] Start playing sad music and I'll be broke.

[ UGH. UGH. UGGGHHHH. He's still upset though. ]
quipsandthwips: (pic#12666853)

[personal profile] quipsandthwips 2018-10-30 09:52 am (UTC)(link)
[Your jokes are totally just bouncing off him like suction-cup arrows. Now he's too busy rubbing his mouth and looking really serious about this whole situation — because he can't just let this whole thing go on stupidly. It's obvious the guy still feels pain, and he's not gonna just be the prime reason Wade can't heal. There's gotta be something here. Think, Peter.]

There's got to be something we can do. An easy fix.

How far does someone have to be, for it not to bounce back?

[Yeah no he's still got the Bambi-eyed look. Just with pacing and chin rubbing now.]
4thwaller: (🗡 Everybody look at your hands)

[personal profile] 4thwaller 2018-10-30 10:05 am (UTC)(link)
[ Quit that Peter. Wade can ignore it. He's had way worse. Remember, ripped in half? Empire State Building jump? ]

I don't know. [ Wade already doesn't like where this is going. ] And I'm not about to test it on you because you're feeling guilty. [ He's been a lab rat before. He doesn't want Peter to have to deal with that too.

Stop with the chin rubbing and the Bambi eyes and the pacing.
] Let's just get this horrorshow over with and you can be on your merry little way to cockblock some other superhero. [ Because he hadn't missed how ready to be done with Wade Peter had been just moments ago. ]
quipsandthwips: (pic#12665502)

[personal profile] quipsandthwips 2018-10-30 10:16 am (UTC)(link)
[He huffs.]

Don't be all petty right now; this is serious. And when exactly did I say I wanted you to be a superhero at me in the first place, exactly? I veto all superheroisms. [Because I'm an actual superhero and will not be superhero'd at.] You're not off the hook just because you wanted to clam up about your performance issues.

[HA!!!!

... What, it was an easy joke.

He rubs at his sore shoulder, still looking very intensely in thought.]


Seriously though. You kind of have to learn the limits to this problem before it actually starts becoming a hindrance to you as a superhero. What if you just — poke yourself with something like a needle, and see if I feel it outside the doors? Or from across this room? We can gauge it, see just how careful you need to actually be.

[Is he implying they stop everything to test this? Of course he is.]

At least let me help you figure it out.
4thwaller: (🗡 A place where they will never find)

why am i even tagging u i hate u

[personal profile] 4thwaller 2018-11-02 05:53 am (UTC)(link)
First of all, you can't veto all superheroisms, what if I have to jump in the way of a bullet or a knife or something. [ Wade does what he wants, Peter, try and stop him. ] And b, excuse me? No you're not allowed to ignore all my flirting and then make dick jokes. That's not how this goes.

[ He's STILL so offended. FEATHERS: RUFFLED. ]

Cool. And I'll learn it when Wolverine is around and I can be sure he'll heal. I'm not doing it, Bambi. Get that freaky Dr. Frankenstein look out of your eyes. I might be a monster but not that one. [ Y e p, Wade's totally ignoring his mad scientisting to head toward the door, LIKE A GOOD BOY. Because he behaves. ] Thanks but no thanks, Baby boy. Maybe next time if you graduate to your own healing factor and big boy boots.

[ Things he'll regret saying to Spider-Man if he ever finds out. ]
quipsandthwips: (pic#12619064)

[personal profile] quipsandthwips 2018-11-02 06:41 am (UTC)(link)
[Uuugh. He follows, looking entirely displeased with this situation.

But hey, isn't it nice that he looks so unhappy at your current predicament.]


You know I can take care of myself, right? I don't need magic healing and pet name skills to get myself through this. [Lord help him.] I pinky promise you, I manage just fine. If I survived college in New York and U.S. healthcare, I can survive a hellhouse.

[He'll let you lead. But also, he's gonna make faces at your back the whole goddamn time.]
4thwaller: (🗡 And I can act like an imbecile)

[personal profile] 4thwaller 2018-11-02 06:58 am (UTC)(link)
I have eyes in the back of my head, I'll know if you're staring at my ass. [ Wade is TOTALLY ignoring that sulkfest Peter has going on. Even if it is ridiculously sweet that he wants to help. ]

Yeah, sure Mr. I Was Stabbed With a Crowbar. Seriously, who lets themselves get stabbed with a crowbar? A crowbar. But also, nice background plot point, I already knew you weren't jailbait though.

[ He opens the door with no hesitation, stepping out like he's expecting a shotgun blast or something. But it doesn't happen. Huh! Oh! Freedom!!!! He's not really paying attention to anything else, turning to look at Peter. ] I totally superhero'd us out of that shithole. Sure. I got us into that mess. But don't you feel closer. I accept kisses in thanks if you felt like it.
quipsandthwips: (pic#12619081)

1/2

[personal profile] quipsandthwips 2018-11-02 09:02 am (UTC)(link)
Uh-huh... Super close...

[But there's — this really obnoxiously long sense of danger (that annoyingly won't get stronger or weaker), so he sounds like he's barely listening to Wade as he steps past him and toward the rather... foggy landscape. Looking at these gravestones, it's easy to see even without the sharpest eye: they're much realer than the ones in the front yard.

He bends forward and raps his knuckles on the stone, lines thinning in a pensive frown.]


... Oh boy. And here I am, out of flowers.

[A pause, and—]

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