JULY TEST DRIVE MEME

[sodder]

JULY 2020 TEST DRIVE MEME

Welcome to July's Test Drive Meme! This month's Test Drive's theme is: JUDGEMENT HORROR.

All Test Drive Memes contain at least one clue to the Deerington's upcoming in-game events for the month! Keep your eyes peeled! But...not literally.

Characters may die during TDMs, but you do not need to count it towards a game-canonical death unless you want to. Consider it a freebie. All TDMs can be considered game canon as TDMs introduce minor aspects about the world of Deerington that can be revisited by characters later on in the game. You may also use TDMs for your application writing sample as well as AC.

CW: Violence, possible gore, intense nightmares, possible death, religion, slow suffocation, melting skin, throat trauma, fire
Don't forget to tag content whenever necessary. Have fun!

Prompt One
Prompt Two
Prompt Three
Character Arrival
Master Navigation

STICKS AND STONES

Anyone who has been to school in Deerington likely knows about the possessed bathroom walls by now. The writing blasting your deepest and darkest fears, your best kept secrets, always manifesting the worst parts of yourself. It starts off slow, and grows, and grows... Anyone who looks at the wall only sees rumors about themselves, usually, but lately, people have started to be able to see rumors being written about other people. The writing slowly starts to leak out of the bathroom, starting to spread on the school walls and lockers. Eventually, it starts to spread out into the town itself.

Writing and drawings start to show up around town. It seems like they're exposing peoples worst memories, their darkest actions, but anyone who reads the writing about themselves will see that Deerington has taken a few liberties to make it seem even worse. Did you kill someone in self-defense? The wall will describe how you did it in cold blood. Or maybe you accidentally broke someone's heart? Everyone will read how you manipulated, lied, and destroyed the emotions of an innocent person. Eventually, it will start to make things up that may have never actually happened, but when it's mixed in with all the stories that hold a grain of truth, how can anyone tell the difference?

People will find themselves compelled to believe the rumors, no matter how well they know the person they're written about. Some people might even find themselves tempted to add to the rumors with writings of their own.

You can not scrub the writing off the wall, but it can be covered up or scratched out by markers and paint. The rumors will just write themselves back in within 24 hours, but at least you might be able to stop people from seeing the worst bits about your personality if you're quick enough.

MAY BREAK MY BONES

People will start to find themselves getting exceptionally tired as of late. Even those who don't normally sleep, or normally can't physically sleep, will still find themselves drifting off into whatever equivalent their body can manage. Maybe you curl up on the sofa for a little nap or you're crawling into bed at the end of a long day or you could even just stretch out in the park to get a little shut eye.

No matter where or when you fall asleep, it will be extremely restless. Nightmarish, even.

You "wake up" in a room with a large climbing wall in front of you and nothing but darkness underneath. You aren't alone; the person beside you seems to have just woken up here as well. Maybe it's a friend, maybe it's a stranger, but you're both going to want to take in your surroundings before you get to any kind of chit chat. You can tell you're dreaming, but it all feels, looks, and smells so real. The scent of rust, metal, and blood fill your senses to an overwhelming degree. If you usually rely on powers, you'll find that they aren't working here. You'll also find out quickly just how mortal you may have become.

The large wall is littered with traps. Spikes that shoot out of the wall, ready to skewer the unfortunate person in front of them. Large bear traps will snap shut, just the right height to cut off a persons head at the neck. Random large bouts of fire and sudden puffs of acidic gas that can melt skin. It's hard to tell what triggers each space or if it's entirely random, but you'll need to move quickly in order to avoid all the death traps that are awaiting you.

Especially once the wall starts to deteriorate in front of you. You have to start climbing. Now. You have to move quickly to avoid the wall falling apart while you're climbing it. If it catches up to you, you'll fall into the darkness below, eventually hitting the sharp rocks at the bottom. If you get injured by one of the traps, you'll find that you can really feel it. You'll bleed the same way you would have if you had been injured in real life— even if you don't normally bleed or feel pain at all.

If you climb fast enough and make it to the top of the wall, there will be a door waiting for you. Walk through and you'll wake up wherever you fell asleep. If you sustained any injuries, you'll find that they've been reflected on your body. Hopefully they weren't fatal. Those who don't have human bodies will still find gashes in their bodies where the injuries may have been sustained in their dreams.

Should you die in the dream? You'll die in real life. The body of someone who dies within the dream will suddenly convulse before turning to the same purple dust that all the other bodies in Deerington do before they're reincarnated a week later.

BUT WORDS STILL HURT LIKE HELL

Sometimes when you wake up from your nightmare realms, you won't be in your bed or on your couch. You'll find instead that you're stuck in a confessional booth, even if it means you've been resized to fit in the small space. There's someone on the other side of the screen, but it's not a priest; it's another Sleeper. You're both trapped, the doors refusing to open, and no amount of physical strength or destructive power will make a dent on the walls. The only way out... is to confess.

And you can't just confess any old thing; it has to be something that has been weighing on your mind for some time. Maybe a memory that fills you with guilt, or admittance to an unrequited love, or a deep desire to hurt someone... Anything that's been keeping you up at night, causing tension inside of you. It's your chance to really get things off your chest.

The longer you take to confess, the more dangerous things will become. The air seems to be slowly being sucked out from the confessional booth, slowly suffocating whoever is sitting inside. Even if you don't normally rely on air, you'll start to find yourself choking. It's like your very life force is being sucked out of you. The more you talk, the easier it becomes to breathe, and once you've both finished? The doors will simply unlock.

When you exit the booth, you'll find yourself inside the Deerington church. Turn around and you'll find there is no booth in sight. Guess it's time to just head home.

Character Arrival

You can read how all characters arrive in Deerington here.

There is not a collective "all these characters showed up at the exact same moment" occurrence in Deerington. Since characters fall asleep, die, or pass out at various times throughout all their worlds, it wouldn't make too much sense if they arrived in game all at the exact same time. There should be some discrepancy between character arrival, whether by a couple minutes, hours, or even days up to a week.

The players are entirely in control of how/when they want to play their characters arriving in Deerington. For TDMs, you can play it like your character has just arrived and that can be maintained as your game canon, or you can wait until game events for that moment. Or you don't need to acknowledge it at all. The flexibility for character allows a bit more of an organic feel to the character arrival situation, so please play it to whatever feels right for you.

If you are interested in having an "arrival" introduction for one of your TDM prompts, you are more than welcome to explore that option.

Comments

[dereban]

...

[ A part of her wants to say something, to say 'I know your name already', but she just instead stews in the silence. Well, it's probably for the best, isn't it? Better to let him never find out, so she doesn't have to answer strange questions about how much she knows.

Ignorance is probably bliss at this moment.

So when he asks her for her name, she answers with a sigh. ]

It's Inaba.

[ The reply comes off as rather cold and indifferent in spite of herself, and she purposely drops her first name from the picture entirely. She knows she probably wouldn't be able to take it if anyone called her that right now. ]

[undermoonlight]

[She's in luck, because Atsushi is becoming quite used to people only having one name. Many of the people he's turned to or chased after in the past month do not have surnames. So in an equally unlucky way, she will now have to deal with Atsushi assuming "Inaba" is her one and only name.

He smiles, testing it out with an honorific to check her reaction;] Inaba-san?

[Unless she seems to hate it, he'll stick to honorifics.]

Even if the circumstances weren't... good... It's nice to meet you? [Will she say anything more? She doesn't seem very talkative. Then again, they did go through a traumatic incident together. Describing their first meeting as 'awkward' is an understatement. Atsushi isn't sure what to do and it's beginning to show in how he stumbles through the conversation.]

Where do you live? Or is there somewhere else that you'd like to go?

[dereban]

[...]

-san is weird, [ She admits without thinking too much. ] since you're older than me. It makes me feel like I've aged a few years, and I'm definitely not that old.

[ The words come off as strangely casual in spite of their circumstances upon meeting not being the best. To almost anyone, it would almost seem as if she's already trying to brush it off quickly, but it's less of that and more -- if she doesn't pull herself together, she'll fall apart.

And she can't.

Not any more than she has to. ]

... The place where they put me in was Mergo Manor. [ She doesn't say anything else. ]

[undermoonlight]

[Atsushi is startled and a bit embarrassed to be called out. He's been trying to start formal with everyone here, since he isn't sure of where he stands in the social hierarchy. He may have been about to accept that he should call her, someone younger than him, by a more casual address... When a confused thought crosses his mind.]

... How did you know I was older than you?

[Even though he's 18, Atsushi has been mistaken for a high schooler by a few other residents. People rarely guess that his age accurately. And Inaba's age never crossed his mind as a factor until she brought it up Is she younger than him? She is wearing a uniform, but he's heard kids graduate between 17 and 18 at these American schools.]

I'm 18. [He wonders if she'll give her age back, for comparison.]

[dereban]

[ Shit.

She curses to herself rather internally when she's called out and a part of her wants to run away so badly. No, no - she can't tell him. She just can not tell him how she knows that fact. Which is why she immediately tries to backpedal, hoping that her quick, frantic lie is bought. ]

Just a hunch.

[ She shrugs her shoulders. ]

Seventeen. I'll be turning eighteen at the end of November.

[undermoonlight]

[As someone who backpedals a lot himself, Atsushi should know the signs... But Inaba is much more skilled at it than he is. He slowly, and forcefully, makes himself let go of any suspicion...

Nodding slowly. Her hunch was correct. He can't fault someone for being right, can he?]

You're right, then. But still... [Calling Kyouka '-chan' doesn't feel too strange, because she is very clearly younger than him. Using '-san' would be weird to Atsushi, too.

That's not how it is with Inaba. She's a stranger, only a year younger than him, and he's afraid of upsetting her. Acting casual with her still feels wrong and disrespectful.]

Inaba... -chan? Uh. -kun? [He's overthinking this. They all sound weird to him.]

[dereban]

[ Of course I am, she thinks but decides not to say aloud.

But she notices that he's struggling a little bit and that's when she finds herself sighing. ]

Just 'Inaba' is fine, if you're okay with that, Atsushi.

[ She refers to him so casually that it's probably more than a little surprising. ]

[undermoonlight]

Huh?!

[This is the face of someone who is okay with it. Don't think too hard. He's certainly trying not to.

It's one thing to have people like Glitch and Vyng call him by his first name; They don't know what '-san' means and don't have honorifics of their own to apply to his name. But Inaba has demonstrated an understanding of honorifics.

He's confused. Atsushi had been ready to force his tongue into a casual address to keep her comfortable, but this?]

... Oh. [He hasn't said anything, stuck in a few seconds of stunned silence.] Y-Yeah, sounds fine... I-Inaba. [That was pretty easy, actually.

Atsushi smiles lightly.] Atsushi is fine for me, too. Thank you.

[dereban]

... Did I say something weird again?

[ She notices his stammering and finds herself looking at him, rather baffled, if only because she feels like maybe he might be catching onto her.

Which is why her gaze looks rather curious, if only because she's finding herself becoming a little more complacent, friendlier. ]

[undermoonlight]

[He flinches, wondering at first if she's indirectly calling him weird. Then letting go of that fear and shaking his head.]

No, not at all. It feels nice.

[Wait. Now he's said something strange. Rewind;]

I mean, it sounds nice. I don't normally address people this way... It's not bad, though. It makes it feel like we could be friends..?

[He's checking her face for any sign that he's gone too far. Inaba seemed quite guarded earlier, so he wasn't expecting her to suggest something so friendly. Atsushi still worries that he might trigger a negative reaction from her. Maybe saying that was too bold of him?]

[dereban]

Oh -

[ And it's right there that she has to stop herself and immediately look away to make sure that she can hide the flush of her cheeks. ]

No, that - we can't -

[ Her voice is slightly strained, even as there's an edge of hope there. Even though she does say 'we', the implications are more about herself.

"I can't be your friend.

It will only hurt." ]

[undermoonlight]

[And there it is; A reality check. Atsushi is disappointed, but not surprised. They have only just met, after all, and their first meeting was 'uncomfortable' at best.

Atsushi forces a smile, not wanting Inaba to catch onto his feelings. Nor does he want to share any of the guilt.]

That's fine! Don't worry about it, Inaba. I overstepped.

[He waves a hand slowly, as if he can fan the uncomfortable atmosphere away.] I'm happy just to know you, honest!

[dereban]

[ Guilt flashes in her eyes and she can't help but look away. Her hands clench by her sides, tight fists as they shake.

When she speaks, it's with a bit of a tremble. ]

Don't say that. It's not true.

[undermoonlight]

[And he's wrong again? Atsushi can't win here. Not only did he apparently say something wrong, but he sees the guilt before she looks away. He hadn't wanted to share that with her.

Though, on a second note... He can't figure out which thing is untrue. His overstepping? Atsushi decides that must be fact; It's what prompted her to be upset. But the only other thing she could be denying is that he's happy to know her. And that's true too, isn't it? He's certainly not unhappy to know her.]

Which did I get wrong..?

[dereban]

[ Another deep breath in and out as she closes her eyes for a moment before finally raises her head, dark eyes serious and focused on him. ]

Why would you be happy to know someone like me? If you really knew me, I'd doubt that you would be.

[ She needs to put those walls back up. Push herself away, so she can protect herself. That way, nobody can get hurt. It's easier that way. Even if she doesn't want to. ]

[undermoonlight]

[So that was what upset her. Atsushi almost files it away in his mental survival guide for Inaba, but he can't. He can't agree with her. He has the Agency and they make him feel wanted, so much so that he's defied his own logic to stay with them. He's redefining himself, enough to stand by Kyouka when everyone else said she'd be a burden. He can't change himself completely, but he can offer change to others.

So even now, he ignores logic to meet Inaba's firm gaze with his own.]

You're right. I might be hasty to make a judgment so fast. But I can't take back what I said.

[He offers a hand, as he's learned to do with many of Maine's residents.]

I'm happy to have met you. And I'm prepared to cross that bridge when I get there, if you'll let me. Inaba. [Especially now that he knows her name, Atsushi can't leave her alone.]

[dereban]

[ For a long while, she's quiet.

And for that moment, she debates on the single question: how can she push him away? But then she realizes that she's been hesitating. Because she's too scared, too terrified to play the 'role' that could give her just that.

Her future self had suggested it before, hadn't she?

Just... become the villain. ]

Then know this.

[ She starts, trying to steady her expression into something cold, her voice icy. It's a sharp contrast to her casual tone from earlier, and it's so abrupt that one could possibly think that there's something off about it. And they'd be right.

All she has to do here is trample on his feelings.

Then he'd leave her, wouldn't he?

He'd hate her for it, and she'd cry the moment she had a chance to be alone, but... it's for the best. That's what she believes. ]

I would never allow a beast who can't save even a single person to be a friend of mine. That kind of human doesn't even deserve to live.

[ Purposeful phrasing.

If she has to throw her heart out the window, then so be it. ]

So stop it.

[ "Stop being kind to me." ]

[undermoonlight]

[Over the course of her icy declaration, Atsushi slowly lowers his arm. Where did she hear that? Was it written somewhere? Had she seen the rumors written around town? She must have seen one before and known from the moment she heard his name just what he was. No wonder she's been so uncomfortable, then. Atsushi doesn't hate her. His expression isn't one of dislike or hatred. It's briefly pained... then accepting. He feels bad for troubling her as long as he did.

His arm falls to his side. He would hurt more to hear that, if he hadn't heard it so many times before. Instead, Atsushi only feels numb and hopeless. Even his gaze drops as he nearly agrees with her.

But again. He can't. Not completely. Not after hearing her confession and knowing how much pain this person has gone through. Maybe he can't stay by her side, but he can't leave her to be alone either.]

... You're-- [right. The word almost slips out. But Atsushi, hand once offered now a clenched fist at his side, tries to keep it together. He's different.
Dazai saved him.
The Agency trusts him.
He's tried. He's trying...]

You're right. Except... It's "couldn't."

[Not can't. He's saved people now. Not enough to justify his existence, but maybe enough to change that one word. Is that too much to ask? He can't erase the nagging feeling that he's hoping for too much by suggesting it.

He can't erase her distrust either. Atsushi looks up, forcing himself to meet her gaze. She should at least know he's not angry, he decides, by seeing the look on his face.]

Vyng-san. And... and Ange-san. You can trust them. [Maybe she won't ever want to reach out to him, but he can at least offer her someone to reach out to.]

I'm sorry. I didn't mean to burden you, Inaba.

[dereban]

[ Ironically enough, she hadn't seen the rumors about him. And even if she had - she already knew the context behind them.

What they all meant.

If she hadn't seen it in the past, hadn't heard it all before. Her eyes are fixed on his, trying to maintain some sense of anger. It's all lies. She's a liar. She doesn't - could never possibly...

And yet, the look in his eyes, how it drops as she goes on.

She should have known better.

He's not mad. No, he's... ]

You're the same as al—

[ She stops herself mid-sentence, biting her lower lip as those words come out way too easily for her.

If he hadn't figured her out before, she's probably caught now. "You're the same as always." That's too obvious, Inaba Himeko! Did you really want him to know about that? Of course you didn't. So why -

Ah, of course.

She's a fucking idiot.

She can't pretend to be the villain when she so wholeheartedly believes that Nakajima Atsushi - no matter which one, is not a bad person. And the one in front of her... is similar enough to the ones she's met - in spite of her knowing, full well, and treating them all as their own person - that it would hurt to get too close. ]

... Sorry. [ She ducks her head, again. ] I... shouldn't have said anything.

[undermoonlight]

[This time, Atsushi does fill in the final blank. But filling in the blank does not mean he understands it. "The same as always?" How can that be, when they've never met before? He knows about different worlds, but the idea of an alternate reality is still foreign.

And he has to put his own wondering out of his head. Inaba's apology sparks concern and confusion. Just a moment ago, she sounded like she hated him and wanted him gone. Now she's retracting it?

... He doesn't question it for long.]

It's not your fault. What you said was true.

[Atsushi still keeps his arms at his side. She may have retracted her hateful words, but he won't offer his hand again. He's sure that she said those things for a reason. And he's been reminded that she's right: Just as Inaba didn't want Atsushi to get to know her better, Atsushi should not want Inaba getting to know what he is. He had to learn the hard way, but now he understands why she pushed him away.]

I overstepped a boundary. I wasn't very considerate of your feelings, Inaba. So it's really me who owes you an apology.

[He should leave it there. Let her respond. Focus on her, help her, do whatever it takes to put Inaba more at ease...

But his thoughts wheel back to earlier;] "Same as..." Always?

[dereban]

[ ...Oh.

She can feel the self-loathing sinking into the atmosphere and that's enough for her breath to still. He says what she said earlier was true, but - no, that's wrong!! she doesn't agree!!

But of course he doesn't understand her feelings at all.

They're strangers.

And she should have treated him like such, too. But, she's a fool... she knows too much. She knows way too much, and she's certain, given his kindness, something that she's tempted to lean into, that he's the kind of person she believes he is. ]

N- No, [ Her voice is shaky and in shambles. She can't run from her lies anymore. ] That was a mistake, it can't be like that, we've never even met before...

[undermoonlight]

[He's stupid, he knows. Sometimes things will go over his head. But when he hears her voice shaking like that, Atsushi can't ignore what he suspects; That there's more to her slip-up then a simple mistaken use of words. That he did hear an "always" forming. As nonsensical as that may be.]

Am I going to meet you? [He's trying to wrap his brain around this, but in a safe manner.

Did she suggest first names because they're already close?

Did Inaba know he was older not because of a hunch, but because he's told her before?

It would be unfair to suspect these things. That's the same as thinking that Inaba has been telling him lies... Yet, he can't shake this feeling anymore. Now that it's in his head, this cat can't escape his curiosity.]

... No, I guess that would be strange. Sorry. I'm being rude again.

[He shakes his head,] But if we've met and I've forgotten you, then I... [Wow, he'd be so mad at himself. Atsushi is also displeased with himself for even thinking that Inaba might have lied.]

[dereban]

... No.

[ She tries to steady her voice, but fails. It's hard for her to get back on her proverbial feet when she's already kicked herself down like this. He's so close to that wall that she doesn't want him to touch.

To the truth that she desperately doesn't want him to kick down.

Fingers tug at the hem of her skirt, uncomfortable as her head hangs, her expression entirely broken up. ]

Like I said before - I have never met you before. But that's why you have to stay away. Because... it's too creepy, isn't it? To have someone who you've never met know too much about you?

[undermoonlight]

[The emphasis on "you" is still lost on him, but he's understanding the jest of it: Inaba has met him in some way that makes her privy to his personal information. She did know his age, she was aware of the rumor, and there's no telling what else she knows.

A hand goes to the opposite arm. Unconsciously, he thinks to hide his Ability. He considers what she's revealed, his expression more of confusion than anything. What is he supposed to feel, versus what he does feel? Atsushi has things he certainly wants kept a secret, sure, but that's because they make him detestable. If she knows already and doesn't detest him, then... Then is there a problem? Should he be bothered? She makes it sound like this should disturb him more than it does. Is he wrong?

He faces her again and shakes his head.]

It's not creepy. I guess I more wonder... "She can't know very much, or wouldn't she have left already?"

[Atsushi looks at her curiously. He wonders if she might understand him better than himself in this situation.] Does it bother you? Have I said things that make you uncomfortable..?

cw vague mentions of abuse because of atsushi's past why this

[dereban]

'Uncomfortable'...

[ Maybe for once in her life, she should be honest. She should tell the truth. If she did, wouldn't that be easier?

Eventually, she shakes her head. When she looks at him again, it's with watery eyes and a smile. ]

It does bother me. But... not in the way you'd expect. You say that I can't know very much, but that's not true. I know everything.

[ She says that with full confidence in spite of her trembling voice, fear taking over. ]

People would think - 'that's ridiculous', isn't it? 'Can you prove it?' But... it's easy, you know. Anything that's happened to you back in Yokohama, I know. [ He never said he was from Yokohama, after all. That's one piece of evidence. ] And I was selfishly trying to push you away with what I said earlier —

I thought... that maybe if I could be cruel enough, if I could truly make you my enemy, then it'd be okay. And isn't the easiest way to do that is by bringing up a dead man's words?