texts from last night (in deerington)

[dividingline]

TEXTS FROM LAST NIGHT

INSTRUCTIONS:

▶ Post a top level with a handful of randomly generated texts from TFLN (cw: very nsfw) AND/OR write texts that your character might have sent after a long night at the Hair of the Dog/down in the sinkholes/recovering from October etc. The more ridiculous and messy the better!

▶ Reply to other people's texts, assuming your character received one either through misfire or on purpose! They can be game canon or not, it's up to you (though they can't count for AC)!

▶ Have fun, stay chill, enjoy some silliness!

Comments

[survivalthroughhate]

Mormon vampires? ......Just what kind of book are you reading again?

Yes. All it took was another death to fix my shattered mind.

[speed_of_snark]

It's a really terrible young adult novel.

Oh.
You okay?

[survivalthroughhate]

That must be why I've never had cause to read it in the library.

I'm fine.

[Maul would say that even if he was lying in the middle of the street bleeding, so the terse reply is really a crock of shit. He'd gone through a horrific experience and that was going to stick with him for a long while, especially given how everyone had condemned him after his network post.]

[speed_of_snark]

It's not good.

Let me rephrase that: HOW bad are you?

[survivalthroughhate]

Then why are you continuing the masochistic routine of reading it?

Not as bad off as you'd think. I took some time to myself and then got some sense punched into me by Reaper. After spending some time with him, I'm much better. Not that anyone but him and like two other people even seemed to care about me, even when I was missing for over two weeks.

[Bitter? Maul? Never. ]

[speed_of_snark]

Boredom.

If I hadn't had a leg bit off and a boyfriend killed, I feel like I might have noticed.

[survivalthroughhate]

I completely understand. At least now you know what to read if you need to fall asleep.

Ah. Well, those are valid concerns. I'm sure many other people had various issues going on that prevented them from noticing my absence. [Or so he hopes.] Also, did you get a prosthetic made yet? [Also also:] A boyfriend? As in you have plural?

[speed_of_snark]

You make a good point.

October is always a shitshow.
That weird Doctor guy made me one. So far it seems to work.
Plural, yes. I have four here.

[survivalthroughhate]

Don't think I've met him. I'll have to remember him in case my own legs go out again or get wrecked past the point of repair.

...... FOUR? I'm not sure whether to give you my condolences or ask you what you eat for breakfast in the morning to keep up with that many.

[speed_of_snark]

My friend David could do it, too. I just felt weird having him make one. Irrational, I know.

Four. It's really not as exhausting as it sounds. But I do eat a big breakfast.

[survivalthroughhate]

Ask Tony Stark as well. The man got me back on my feet last time my legs were fried by one of the little brats here, pun intended.

You know, there are some species in the galaxy that have up to a dozen or so partners at a single time, but even so, it sounds like far too much emotional work for me. And noisy and crowded. Very noisy and very crowded.

[speed_of_snark]

They got fried?

It's actually not very loud. I think I'M the loud one.

[survivalthroughhate]

Yes. I got into an argument with that little brat called Glitch and he electrocuted me during the course of it, which caused my legs to short out. He's a menace.

If you look around in the room and don't see a loud person, then yes, you ARE the loud one. That's how I discovered I was the quiet one in most scenarios.

[speed_of_snark]

Sounds like kids I've taught.
So your legs are robotic all the way?

Awww. You're shy.

[survivalthroughhate]

My entire lower half from the waist down is robotic. The unfortunate consequence of a duel I lost many years ago.

When I was a child and young adult, perhaps. [Truth be told, he'd been terrified of speaking out of turn for fear Sidious would severely punish him. He'd been very shy and skittish as a child before his heart became hardened.] Now I've merely learned the wisdom of using as few words as possible and learning to listen instead.

[speed_of_snark]

So. Wait.
Do you have a robot dick?

Yeah, that's a lesson more of us should probably learn.

[survivalthroughhate]

No.

[The laconic answer really says more than words ever could, while also raising more questions.]

Somehow, I doubt it would stick with you.

[speed_of_snark]

So no dick at all.

Hey, I can learn when I feel like it.

[survivalthroughhate]

Unless you feel the need to add me to your harem, that is none of your business.

[..... Yup. No dick.]

And how often do you feel like it?

[speed_of_snark]

Not impossible. You're actually pretty hot.

Depends.

1/3

[survivalthroughhate]

[He's about to respond when the first part of that statement hits him.]

2/3

[survivalthroughhate]

[Wait. Whaaaaa--]

3/3

[survivalthroughhate]

You flatter me. But even if I was interested, I think my significant other might object, and then proceed to rip out your throat with his claws.

[Reaper can be a bit of the jealous type.]

[speed_of_snark]

Oh honey, I'm used to men with claws. Not scared at all.

He sounds great.

[survivalthroughhate]

While a lack of fear is something Sith are trained to learn, I think in your case it might just be stupidity rather than courage.

Oh he is. I've met no one in such a long time that understands me so very well. I'd kill everyone in this town and set it on fire if he asked me to.